The Things We Love About Summer

Catching fireflies in open fields ... sea-tousled hair and sun-kissed cheeks ... backyard brunches, easy glamour, charming gardens ... tie score, bases loaded, bottom of the ninth ... cool cocktails on hot hazy nights ... flip-flops, road trips, shark tales, lazy mornings, long days, ocean sunrises, bay sunsets.  That delicious school's-out feeling that never leaves, no matter what your age.  These are the things we love about summer.  And we'll be celebrating them all month, on Style Maniac.

Photo above and in this month's masthead via Marter del Universo on Pinterest.

BREAKING THE ICE: Guest Post by Alanna Kalb

In our recent focus on entertaining we've talked about what to wear, how to look good in photos and what gifts to bring.  But perhaps the biggest challenge as a guest is having fun at a party where you don't know anyone but the host.  Recently I asked Alanna Kalb, author of a chic and clever little book called Stuff Every Woman Should Know to wrap up our Spring series on presents and parties by sharing with us her tips for turning a room packed with strangers into a space filled with potential friends.

If life is for living, reason dictates that parties are for partying. And what better way to get in the party spirit than by making new friends? Try to get comfortable talking to anyone, anywhere. It’s a good skill for lots of reasons.  If you don’t know anyone at the party except for your popular host, better to be chatting up a friendly stranger than lurking alone in the kitchen, pretending the ice trays need filling. And who knows who you’ll meet, or what you’ll learn? I’ve made some amazing friends by having the guts to ask some girls to lunch (office party), got an intro course on backpacking through Patagonia by sitting next to my host’s little brother (backyard BBQ), and made a valuable business contact through a friend’s mother (dinner party). Keep an open mind, and do smile at strangers! Below, a three-step guide to making a new friend or, at the very least, staying entertained while you wait in line for the bathroom.

1. Put away your phone, make eye contact and smile.
2. No one is expecting you to charm them with wit and intelligence (although they probably won’t mind if you do). So often we’re too afraid of sounding or acting “wrong” that we don’t do anything at all. Start small- ask how he/she knows the host. Ask where that delicious-looking tofu kebab came from. Ask where she found those beautiful clip-on earrings. You can’t go wrong by asking questions: people love talking about themselves, and they’ll love you for giving them the opportunity.
3. If you just don’t feel comfortable with the in-person cold call, rope your host into making a few introductions. Follow the host around and when you float into a group that seems your type, stay and chat for a while. Repeat as necessary.

(Note: When we’re nervous, we often like to be holding something—and at a party, it’s bound to be a drink. Make sure you don’t gulp down more than you meant to. If you think a few drinks will loosen you up and make you charming, you’re taking the wrong page out of Charlie Sheen’s book.)

You don’t know when the next time is that you’ll be wearing your highest heels, so kick them up! If there’s food and it looks delicious, pile a plate high. Take a whack at the piñata; make a (brief, sincere) toast; catch up with the aunt you haven’t seen in years. Enjoy that party to the fullest and by all means, strike up a chat with the person sitting next to you.

Alanna Kalb is a writer based in New York City. An enthusiast of brunch, parties, and pithy quotations, she is thrilled that Stuff Every Woman Should Know (Quirk Books) gave her a reason to be a modest know-it-all.


Top photo via Megan Gilger on Pinterest. 

THE GIFT I'D GIVE EVERY GRADUATE: How To Steal Like An Artist

This does not exist as a book yet.  But it should.  Even if it's the slimmest, smallest book ever made.  The advice is so spot on, so smart, and presented with such clarity that I'd give it to every graduate that comes my way. Including some in mid-life.  I'd like to steal all the text and images from Austin Kleon's post, but instead I'll send you to his site to read "How to Steal Like An Artist and 9 Other Things Nobody Told Me."  Please come back after you read it and share what advice resonated with you most.

p.s. Here's a real steal: an original work of art by Denise Fike.  The winner of our Sponsor Giveaway,  chooses her own piece from a selection of 10.  Enter by Tuesday 5/24/11.

PLAN ON SERENDIPITY

"The best parties arise from a mix of 
intense planning and pure serendipity."

-- Style Maniac

Serendipity II courtesy Kerri Shipp

GET READY FOR YOUR HD CLOSEUP

 

First HD TVs, now HD camcorders and cameras.  So now when you're posing at a party, the camera is going to see absolutely everything. To the rescue: HD makeup of course. Recently at a private Sephora event I tried Make Up For Ever's version.  I'm not sure what impressed me more:  the product itself or that the Sephora expert matched the perfect shade to my skin in a nanosecond.  Yes, there are drawbacks: the makeup is expensive, you have to use a Primer to get the full effect, you have to apply it in a specific way (only downward strokes). But there's something to be said for having a pro match your skin tone with the actual product rather than DIY-ing it yourself with those useless drugstore color charts.  And then of course there's the promise of perfection.

So how did it work in real life?  I took home a sample to see.  On a day when I was feeling lousy and tired, comments ranged from "What makeup?' to "Oh, I thought you just looked refreshed from your vacation."  Since I hadn't been on vacation I guess that's a good thing. As for how it looks on camera:  I'll let you know after my upcoming headshot photo session.  (Upcoming as in ... been meaning to do it for months and still haven't.  But I will ....)

Image from Make Up For Ever's HD Not Retouched ad campaign

PRACTICAL MAGIC 102: Tips on Lighting Your Own Events from Expert Bentley Meeker

Low-key lighting and lanterns enhance the feel of a Tuscan farmhouse at Billy Joel & Katie Lee's wedding.

I sometimes think it's my mission in life to go around dimming lights, a habit I (thankfully) inherited from my mother.  As it turns out, my mom and lighting expert Bentley Meeker have a lot in common.  As you'll see in Meeker's tips for lighting your own events (the conclusion to our series on lighting), dimmers are a girl's--and an event's--best friend.

Dimmers+candlelight= magic at a party for P. Diddy.

STYLE MANIAC:  When you and your company produce a lighting design for an event, what is the single most important thing you want to achieve?
BENTLEY MEEKER: The greatest compliment I've had in a long time was when the esteemed event designer Susan Holland walked into a space we lit and said, "It 'feels' amazing in here ...." That's what I try to achieve every time.

What is the most important thing to keep in mind when lighting an event?
Dimming. Hands down, bar none, dimming.

What's the most flattering light for an event and how can we achieve it with a limited budget?
Candles, incandescent light and dimming. Change out switches to dimmers (should cost about $100 +/- per switch - and every venue would want that done if it isn't already) and use candles.

What is the biggest mistake people make when lighting an event?
They make it too bright, or use LED's to create bold colors but then throw unflattering light into rooms.

Imagine how different this room at the University Club in New York City would look with bright lights.

Can you give Style Maniac readers your three top tips to improve the lighting at any event without spending a lot of money?

1. As evidenced by my book launch, I love candlelight. It still is the most beautiful...
2. Color existing lights by changing bulbs or gelling high hats.
3. Dim everything just a little darker than you initially think it should be. The eye adjusts and that becomes the "sweet spot" for ambiance.

Many thanks to Bentley for graciously sharing his secrets with all of us. For more on his work, visit Bentley Meeker Lighting & Staging Inc. (Photos above via his website, except top photo from Light X Design: 20 Years of Lighting.)

PRACTICAL MAGIC 101: Tips on Lighting Your Home from Expert Bentley Meeker

Bentley Meeker (Photo: Jacob Getz)

At the launch party for Light X Design: 20 Years of Lighting, I got to meet the lighting magician himself, Bentley Meeker.  I asked him if he'd share some of his secrets, and tell Style Maniac readers how to create magical lighting in our own homes and at our own events.  He readily agreed. 

Here, his advice on lighting your home.

STYLE MANIAC:  Lighting is such a critical part of how we feel, look, interact with people and yet it's not something most people give much thought to.  Why do you think that is?
BENTLEY MEEKER: I think it's somewhat technical in its design and application and as such people default to a simplified relationship to light which is one of visibility. It is a subtle and often ephemeral medium to create in and to be used effectively requires a little bit more attention than many of us are used to giving to things.

What can we do to change our focus, become more aware of it, and integrate good lighting into our daily lives?
Awareness, as in so many things, is a presence to things. We notice objects but not the intangibles around them.

We'll paint a wall to give a room a certain vibe, but we can light that wall and give that room a completely different vibe. And possibly even a better one.

The integration will invariably ensue after the initial awareness has been created.

Three weddings at New York's Plaza Hotel show how light -- not paint -- can dramatically change the look of a space. At left, Melissa River's fairytale wedding in the Terrace Room.  At right, the Grand Ballroom in completely different wardrobes of red and gold. (Photos: from author's archives, David Hechler and Roger Dong; all from Light X Design: 20 Years of Lighting by Bentley Meeker.  Available from Glitterati.)

What is the most important thing to keep in mind when lighting a home?
I think it begins with how do you want to feel in your home. Would a chandelier do it? A floor lamp? Uplights in the corners throwing light up the walls and softly bouncing on the ceilings? Each creates a different feeling so go to the store and experiment wildly. It's not expensive and may change your life.

What are the biggest mistakes you find in residential lighting?
Compact fluorescents. CFL's are now potentially being mandated by federal law. That would be a simple mistake put on megasteroids.

What's the most flattering light and how can we get it in our homes?
Daylight. Freeing windows from heavy treatments and dark curtains makes a huge difference in how, and how much, daylight enters the home. If you're building, put lots of skylights in. They're gorgeous!

Does the approach of layering light levels in a room--overhead, task, accent--still apply or do you have a better way of lighting a room?
It applies, but the effect of light is cumulative. So every bit of light brought into a scenario has to be counter balanced by the dimming of the others. Differing qualities of light is wonderful for contrast. You invariably get nice shadowing. Putting the different elements on dimmers and experimenting with them for 10 minutes will get you a vibe you will love in this type of circumstance.

Yes, you can try this at home.  At this wedding in New York's Gotham Hall, traditional residential lighting layers--overhead, task, spot are used to great effect.  Chandeliers and uplights add drama while votive candles and table lamps create intimacy and warmth.  (Photo by Terry Gruber from Light X Design.)

The array of home lighting can be confusing.  What are the pros/cons and types of light given off by incandescent / fluorescent /LED?  And are there other options for the home we might not know about?
I use LED's in areas that are not living areas. I have them in my hallways on a timer and in my basement, as well as one in the light on the front of my house. In my kitchen I use halogens and in my house, low voltage halogens or incandescents.

For me, all the new technology hasn't addressed the simplest but most important element that lighting for the home needs: beauty. We can save electricity, but if we feel worse, how do we spend the money saved ...?

Can you give Style Maniac readers your top three easy and effective at-home lighting tips?

1. Put everything you can on dimmers.
2. Use incandescent or halogen lighting (far more beautiful than compact fluorescent or LED) on those dimmers.
3. Experiment with color. Soft ambers or pinks in select places can bring a lot of happiness to a home.

Up next: The final story in our lighting series, Practical Magic 102: Bentley Meeker's Tips on Lighting Your Own Events.

MAGIC WAND, anyone?

March, advises Frederic Fekkai in his book A Year of Style,  is the time to "clarify your look and re-create yourself."  Clarify and re-create, indeed.  While I'd love to have the sunny glow and carefree swagger of this model from his book, right now I'm feeling more like the old crone from the Wizard of Oz, with sallow winter skin verging on green, hair frazzled from indoor heat and feet not fit for public appearance.  Yes, I need a makeover from head to toe to get me into Spring shape.  Alas, there's no fairy godmother waving her magic wand over me, so I'm going to have to do it myself.  An at-home facial is definitely in order, so I'll slather on Guinot's Masque Essentiel Nutri-Confort, my long-time quick fix for some "instant radiance" (and no, Guinot's not paying me to promote this).  Next I may try some of Mr. Fekkai's other advice, and replace my morning coffee with hot lemon water for a week.  Not exactly sure what that does, but saturating myself in Vitamin C certainly couldn't hurt.  Other than that, I'm in need of suggestions. 

Dear readers, please tell me:  How do you shake off winter and revive yourself for Spring?